I don't know. What do you want to eat?

So I was standing in the Health and Diet section at Barnes & Noble starring at the selection of books on food and it convinced me to go on a starvation diet. Not because any book that I saw there advocated it, but specifically because they didn’t. There was a book on why you shouldn’t eat meat because of all of the hormones that they inject in the animals. I can’t eat mass-produced vegetables because they are all treated with chemicals and genetically engineered. All seafood is out because of the mercury. No organic food because of lack of local over-site and possibility of e.coli-type contaminates. And to top it all off, I can’t drink water because of the buildup of estrogen progesterone and other prescription drugs that aren’t filtered out through the body or by water treatment plants. There is nothing that I can eat or drink that is actually good for me. So here I now sit, hungrily, eyeing a bag of Doritos made of things called disodium phosphate, inosinate, and guanylate, and wondering if my health is really worth it.